Unexplored Feelings
by lightfae530
Summary: Kenzi is leaving, but she doesn't know that it will spark something in Dyson when she does. Can Dyson forget her? Or does he need her more than ever.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey Guys! New one- shot!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Lost Girl, Showcase, the characters or anything else pertaining to the show or programing. If I did would I be writing fanfiction?**

**Dyson might be OOC so ignore it.**

**Unexplored Feelings**

**By: lightfae530**

**Beta'd by: RockAngel777**

**Summary: Kenzi is leaving, but she doesn't know that it will spark something in Dyson when she does. Can Dyson forget her? Or does he need her more than ever.**

As I was getting ready to go to the Dal, a thought occured to me. I have been in this world with Bo for four years, and I realized that I was tired of fighting. The more I thought about it, the more my mind was made up. I was leaving this behind to find a normal life or as close to one as I could.

In the next few months I did every job I could to save money. When I had enough to keep me comfortable until I found a job I was ready to tell everyone. The day came that I had decided to leave arrived, I had Trick call everybody to the Dal. When I got there they were already there.

"What's up?"

"We don't know Kenzi, you tell us."

"Alright , I have been planning this for months and today is the day."

"What's going on, Kenz?" Dyson asked.

"So this won't hurt so much I decided to tell you and leave. I'm moving to the states, to get away from all the Fae crap and have a normal life."

They all looked at me like I was crazy. "I'm tired of the constant danger and I just need to leave."

Bo was the first to speak. "But Kenzi you can't leave, I'll miss you too much."

Hale said," Who am I going to pick at and do my handshakes with?"

Trick said," Who is going to drink all my liquor?"

Dyson was the only one who stayed quiet. But there was a sadness in his eyes, I didn't understand. He just stood there looking at me.

"Guys, I will come back to visit I just can't live here anymore. I love you all , but I need this. Please understand." As I made my way around to each of them saying goodbye and hugging them I felt tears well up in my eyes.

"Guys, I love you all, but I have to catch my bus." Dyson asked if I needed a ride to the bus station. I said, "Yes, if you don't mind."

He grabbed my bags and with a wave and a blown kiss I left. We didn't talk all the way there, it wasn't until he got my bags out that he finally said something. I looked at him and he said, "Do you really have to go, Kenzi?"

"I mean I know why you want to leave, but will you reconsider?"

"Yes Dyson, I have to go,I have to do this for me. And besides now you all won't have to worry about the weak human."

He looked at me and said, "I kinda like taking care of you."

"That's sweet of you to say, but I know I sometimes get in the way."

"But Kenzi, you're part of our family and we don't want to lose you."

"Dyson you'll never lose me. Maybe when I get a place you guys can come see me so that you know I am okay. Now give me a hug before I go." He pulled me into his arms and I felt cared for and safe. But there was something more, something he wasn't saying. I looked up at him, I could see the pain in his eyes. I asked him if was there anything I could do.

All he said was, "Stay." I hugged him again and turned and boarded the bus. As I sat down I looked out the window, he was looking at me with a sad smile on his face. I kissed my hand and placed it on the window, he did the same. It made my heart skip a beat. And the tears began to fall. As the bus pulled away he stood watching me. Then he was gone. I cried all the way to Los Angeles. I couldn't get the look on his face out of my mind. He looked so hurt, so lost. I had only seen that look a few times before, and I hated I had caused it to happen again.

It took me almost a month to find a job. And two months to find a nice apartment. But now it was six months later and I was doing great. I had kept in touch as I promised, texting everyday. I would call once or twice a week, just to hear Bo's voice.. I called everyone else too. But Dyson hadn't answered when I called him. I just figured he was busy. I didn't think much about it, until one day my phone rang. I didn't think to look at the caller I.D. I just answered it.

"Hello, this is Kenzi it's your fifty, speak."

"Kenzi?" I would recognize that voice anywhere.

"Wolfman, I thought you had forgotten how to talk."

"No, Kenzi, I just didn't know what to say."

"I forgot you're a man of few words. How have you been?"

"Okay, and you? I'm great D-man. So what are you up to these days?"

"Just working and missing a certain little human."

"Aww, do you really?"

"Yes Kenzi, it's too quiet. That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy."

"Smart ass human."

You know it, that's me."

Hey Kenz, would it be okay if Bo, Hale, and I came down for a visit?"

"Wow! That would be great! When are you coming?"

"Wait, let me see when we're all free. I'll call you back."

"Great, I'll be waiting. Okay Kenz, I will talk to you soon."

"Okay D-man , by the way I missed you too." Then I hung up. I was so excited I would get to see my family again. Except for Trick, I would have to go there to see him.

About three days later my phone rang. This time I looked at the I.D. and I couldn't answer fast enough. "D-man when will you be here?"

"How about right now?"

"What, where are you?" Just then I heard a knock at the door. I told him to hold on and answered the door. I opened the door and there they were, I jumped into Bo's arms. Then to Hale after a hug and a handshake, I got to Dyson.

"I thought you were going to call me."

"I did." I smacked him on the chest. "Before you came."

"I thought this would be better."

"Actually it is."

He said,"Come here you." I went into his arms and was squeezed hard.

"I can see you weren't lying about missing me."

"Nope, I really have missed you, Kenz."

"Come on in. How long can you stay?"

"We have a week."

"Great, when I go to work tonight I'll ask if I can get some time off."

"You have to work tonight?"

"Yes, I work 5 til 2."

"Where do you work?"

"At a bar as a waitress."

"Well, can we come along?"

"Yes, but Hale and Dyson you have to promise not to interfere with my customers." They agreed but somehow I didn' t believe them.

When we got to the bar, they chose a table away from the main traffic. As the night progressed I would check to see if they needed anything. I had a really difficult customer, but I had dealt with him before, so I knew how to handle him. As I was calling him a cab, he grabbed my ass. I heard the growl , but thankfully no one else did. I looked at Dyson and shook my head letting him know I had this. He sat back down, but he wasn't happy.

I finished my shift and got them to the car. Bo and Hale were a little tipsy, but Dyson was more drunk than I'd ever seen him. I managed to get them back to my place. I put Bo in my room and Dyson and Hale in the spare room.

I needed to relax so I ran a bath. As I was getting out I wrapped a large towel around myself and went to get my pjs. I was looking down to make sure my towel was secure so I didn't see him. I ran straight into Dyson's chest. I accidently dropped my towel as I went to scoop it up he grabbed my wrists. From my position I had to look up to see him. He had a strange look in his eyes that I couldn't read.

"Dyson what are you doing? I thought I was alone."

He said he was going to get some water. I pulled my towel around myself as I stood up. He was still looking at me strangely. "What's going on Dyson? It was an accident."

He said,"I would like to have more of those accidents."

"Come on Dyson , you have Bo."

He looked me in the eyes and said,"We are friends nothing more. That relationship is over."

I was surprised. He hadn't spoken like that since I had gotten his love back. "When did that happen?"

"Sometime before you left."

"Why wait until now to tell me?"

"Can we talk?" He asked.

"Let me get dressed, I will be in the living room in a few." While I was getting dressed my mind was going in a thousand different directions. He was waiting for me when I came out of my room.

"Okay D-man, what do you want to talk to me about?"

"Kenzi, I've been thinking about you a lot since you left."

"And what have you discovered?" He took my hands in his and looked into my eyes. I knew it was hard for him to talk about his feelings, so I put my hand on his face. "Look Dyson, if you can't say it, I totally understand."

He shook his head and then he said, "I have missed you so very much."

"I have missed you too."

"No not like this Kenzi, like this." He leaned over and kissed me, taking me by surprise. When he moved back he searched my eyes for my reation. It took me a minute to register what had just happened. He looked like he had made a mistake. As soon as I could speak I looked at him, he looked so sad.

"Dyson please don't look like that I was just surprised."

"Are you mad?"

I took his face in my hands and did the only thing I could do. I kissed him with all I had. When the kiss ended he was smiling. "I thought I had messed up. But from that kiss I think I'm right."

"Yes Dyson you are, I have wanted to do that forever."

"But why did you wait, Kenzi?"

"Because I thought you still loved Bo, and I was afriad."

"Afraid of what?"

"That you wouldn't feel the same."

"Oh Kenzi, I have wanted you since the day we met."

"Dyson, you've been in my thoughts and dreams almost constantly since we met."

"We have wasted so much time. Can we see where this goes? That's all I want, Kenzi." Then we kissed again a full on tongue in mouth it ended all I could say was wow.

"I second that" said Dyson.

"So what do we do now? We can't really spend any time alone with Bo and Hale here."

"I have a few more days off due. When I get back I will arrange for the time off and be back in about a week."

"But Dyson, I can't get any more time off for at least six months."

"That's okay I can find something to do while you're at work. Is that okay with you or would you rather me wait?"

"No Dyson, I want you to come as soon as you can." He kissed me and we sat together for a couple of hours. Dyson noticed that I was yawning and told me to get some sleep. We kissed goodnight. Bo was sleeping soundly as I slipped into bed.

The week went by too fast. When then the time came I was sad to see them go. We said our goodbyes and hugged each other and they got in the car. Dyson said he had forgotten something. He came back in and grabbed me and kissed me and said he would see me in a week or so. I could tell he didn't want to go, I told him to call me as soon as they got home. He assured me he would. After a final kiss he left. I could not believe it, I was going to get my chance with Dyson. When my phone rang a few hours later, it was Dyson.

"You can't be home yet."

"No , but I wanted to hear your voice, I miss you already."

"Dyson I missed you the moment you walked out the door."

"I don't know if I can wait a week Kenzi."

I know, but it will go by fast. You can call me everyday."

"I probably will call you several times a day." I laughed at him. He asked if I didn't want him to call.

"No Dyson, call me as much as you want to, I love hearing your voice."

"Good because you are going to hear it alot." Once again I laughed at him, "You're like a teenager. But I love it, can't wait to see you."

I hung up. About fifteen minutes later my phone rang , all I heard was miss you then he hung up. I shook my head putting my phone away. I was just stepping out of the shower, my phone was ringing. It was Dyson again, he wasn't kidding about calling me alot.

"Yes Dyson?"

"I just wanted to hear your voice."

"It was kinda sweet. I'm getting ready for work. I won't be able to talk to you at work."

"Then I will text you."

"Okay, I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"What time do you get off work?"

"At one a.m."

"Okay talk to you later."

All night at work I kept getting texts every thirty minutes. I couldn't believe he was being like this, he was like a love-sick kid. As I got into the car to go home, my phone rang. I didn't answer it I wanted to see what he would do. I got text and then another call. I picked up the phone and told him goodnight. He said goodnight and said that he would talk to me before work tomorrow. The calls and texts continued for the next week. I couldn't wait to see him, so the calls would stop for a while.

Finally the day arrived. I was so nervous and I didn't know why. Then he was there at my door, all rockin' body and wolfish grin. _I feel like little red riding hood_. I thought to myself.

He grabbed me in a bone crushing hug and kissed me long and slow. I was lost in him. He pulled back and I had to shake my head to clear my mind. "God Kenz, I've missed you so much."

"I've missed you too Dyson. Come on in." He got his bag and headed to the extra bedroom. That kinda made me sad. I thought we would be sharing my bed. I guess he wasn't sure, so to be safe. When he came out I was looking at him and then it hit me. I was in love with him, totally head over heels in love.

As I stumbled back to the couch he came to me, "Are you okay Kenz?"

"Yes, Dyson, I'm fine, just realized something and it hit me like a ton of bricks."

"What was that?"

"I'll tell ya later. What do you want to do? I'm off tonight. Let's go get some food and then we can watch a movie and cuddle."

"I can do that." After we finished eating we were sitting on the couch and he held out his arms and said, "Come here I've been thinking about this since I left."

"I've been dreaming about this every night." I settled into his arms and I felt like I was finally where I belonged.

It was getting late so I decided to go to bed. Dyson I am tired I am going to bed.

He said, "Goodnight Kenz." We kissed and went to our seperate rooms. I didn't want him in there, I wanted him with me, but he had to want it too. So I took myself to bed and laid there staring at the ceiling. I wondered if he was thinking about me too? After two sleepless hours I gave up and got out of bed. I was going to have a drink to see if it would make me sleepy. As I was pouring a drink Dyson came walking in. He walked up to me and put his arms around me. I turned around and kissed him. I hoped in that kiss he would know what I wanted. When he pulled back there was a question in his eyes. I was finding it hard to tell him what I wanted. But thank God he asked me.

"Kenzi, what do you want?"

"Dyson, I want you in my bed, naked."

He let out a deep breath and said,"Gods, you don't know how much I wanted to be with you, but I didn't know I how you felt." I took his hand and led him to my bed. It was going to be a good night.

We started to strip as soon as we reached the bedroom. Neither one of us could wait to explore each others bodies. As he laid me down on the bed and he kissed me . His hands touching every part of me and I him. I remembered Bo telling me about a certain spot just above his hip.I took my nails and scratched over it. That got me a very passion filled look from him. He was killing me with kisses and little bites all over he spread my legs and started to stroke my clit . I was going wild. He slipped two fingers inside me and I could feel myself tightening around them.

"Dyson, I'm going to cum."

"It's okay Kenzi go ahead." So I did and it was like I had never done that before.

"There you go that's it. Now we'll make love." He positioned himself over me. In that moment before he entered me I could see all of the passion, the want, and the desire he held for me. I told him as he entered me that I had wanted this since the first time I'd seen him. When he started to move inside me I felt the most wonderful feeling i had ever expeirienced. I didn't know at the time what it was , but I would soon find out. At that moment I could think of nothing else except making love to Dyson. I began to move matching him stroke for stroke. I saw the look of surprise on his face.

I just smiled an grabbed his hair in my hand and flipped him onto his back.I began to ride him, up and down as I went down I would tighten my muscles around him. I knew I was driving him crazy. I decided to change positions wanting this to last as long as possible. I slid to the edge of the bed and he got up and slammed into me. We enjoyed that position for a while. Then he pulled out and flipped me over to take me doggy style. I couldn't get past the irony of this. He was a wolf after all. But damn it felt so good I didn't want it to end. But I could feel my climax coming.

"Dyson!" I screamed and then I felt his climax too. We came together and then we fell to the bed. It took a while for our breathing to return to normal. When we finally could breathe we looked at each other and that's when we we couldn't say it just yet. It was too soon. We just held each other and slept.

The next morning I got up to fix breakfast and coffee. When he walked in wearing only his boxers. I was looking at his body. Thinking how could I be so lucky to get someone like him?

"What are you thinking about beautiful?"

"You think I'm beautiful?" He came over to me, kissed me and said, "I have always thought you were beautiful."

"I was thinking how in the hell did I get someone as sexy as you?"

"You got me because I wanted you so much. I'm so glad I finally got you."

"So am I, Dyson, so am I."

We spent the next week enjoying each other every chance we got. I hated to go to work, but I so loved to come home. Dyson was always waiting for me with a glass of wine and a kiss. I loved being with him, but the time came for him to leave. I tried to stay strong and not to cry, I was doing fine until the last kiss then the tears started.

Dyson had went to put his bag in the car, I turned away. He came up behind me put his arms around me from behind and hugged me. Then he caught the scent of my tears. "Beautiful, what's wrong?"

"I'm okay Dyson."

"Tell me why you're crying."

"I just don't want you to go."

"Come with me then."

"Dyson I can't do that, I have a life here."

"Please come back with me Kenzi. I don't want to leave you here. I want you with me."

"Dyson if you still want me to come home with you in six months I will. My lease will be up and I can leave." Then I ran in the house and cried for hours. Why did it hurt so much to say goodbye? Then it hit me full force. I was copletely in love with him, but I needed to know he loved me.

When he got home he called me. I was still crying. "Kenzi are you okay?"

"Yes Dyson, I'm, I just miss you."

"I miss you too, beautiful I will see you soon. I will call you every day." I told him that I would love to be in his arms.

He said, "Baby that's what I want more than anything.

"I miss the feel of your skin under my hands, the beat of your heart. My bed is so cold without you, Dyson."

"I'll be back there as soon as I can. I have something in the works and if it happens I will be with you soon and for two or three months. Would you like that Kenzi?"

"I would love it, you know I would. Please let me know when your plans are set. I can't wait to have you here with me. It broke my heart to watch you drive away."

"I know my beautiful lady I didn't want to go."

"Please come back to me Dyson." He could hear the tears in my voice.

"Kenzi please don't cry. Baby, I will be with you again soon."

"Promise me Dyson that you will be with me as soon as you can."

"Yes baby, I will as soon as I can, I promise."_ He realized then that Kenzi was truly afraid he wouldn't come back. _

"Kenzi you have my word I will come to you soon."

"Dyson I have something to tell you when you get here."

"Tell me now Kenzi."

"No you have to be here for me to tell you."

"Okay baby I will. Sleep well , I will talk to you tomorrow."

I tried to keep busy to keep my mind off missing Dyson, but each time he called it came back. I didn't think I could wait to see him. He was telling me he would probably be here by next week, but that was too long. I had arranged to be off work Thurs. thru Sun. So I was going to see him. I called Dyson and asked him if he would be at the Dal tonight, at about seven.

"Why?"

"I'm having something delivered to you there."

"What is it?"

"Nope you will have to wait till tonight."

"What have you done Kenzi?"

"Nothing bad I promise."

"Okay, I will call you when I get it."

"Okay, I'm looking forward to it."

I was getting so excited, the closer I got the more I couldn't wait to be there. I got there at five till seven, Dyson's car was already there. I could surprise him. I got out straightened my clothes and opened the door. His head turned to see who was coming in, I could tell he was surprised. He jumped up and ran to me.

"I told you I was sending you something."

"And what a surprise it is."

"Are you pleased?"

"I couldn't be more pleased."

"I want to take you home and make love to you all night, but first. Trick, I have a surprise for you."

"What is that?" Trick asked. Then I stepped from behind Dyson, Trick's eyes lit up, "Kenzi!"

He ran over and hugged me. "I didn't know you were coming home."

"I just came for a short visit. I have to go back Sunday."

"Well, come and have a drink."

Before I could make it to the bar Hale came in. "Hey lil mama didn't know you would be here." We did one of our handshakes and hugged. It felt great to be home. Dyson and I made our way to the bar. Just then Bo and Lauren came in.

"Hey Bobo what's up?"

"Kenzi what are you doing here?"

"I got a few days off so I came home. I have to leave Sunday."

"Good we can have some girl time."

"Yes, we can tomorrow, right now I need to rest."

"Where are you staying?"

"I'm going to get a hotel room. Now Bo, no objections. I will see you tomorrow." Dyson was looking like he lost his best friend. I hugged everyone and left. As soon as I got in my car I texted Dyson, meet me at your place. He told everybody he would see them later. I was waiting for him when he got to his apartment. He said, "I thought you were staying at a hotel."

"Dyson you know I would stay with you. I just had to tell them that so I could leave. Unless, you want me to go."

"You know I want you in my bed," he said. Then we went upstairs. I wanted to enjoy being with him.

We had hardly gotten in the door, when our clothes began to come off. We were kissing and touching and we couldn't get close enough to each other. It was so intense that I felt like we were catching on fire. But I had something I wanted to do. I pushed him onto the bed and slid his pants off. I started kissing him at his ankles and moved up his legs slowly. He was trying so hard to control himself, but I could see he was close. I touched his erection and he crumbled, but I wasn't done. I raised up with him looking at me, I opened my mouth and went down on hsi erection. He let out a gasp. I started moving up and down slow at first then faster, licking and sucking as I went. He was getting close and he warned me. but I stayed still sucking in every last drop.

Then I got him hard again. He pulled me under him and slid into me. It was the most pleasure I had in while. I grabbed his shoulders and clawed him all the way to his waist. I could hear the growls and I knew his wolf was at the surface. But I also knew that it wouldn't hurt me.

So I whispered in his ear, "Hello wolfy welcome to the party." I heard a howl and that's when the pleasure intensified. I hadn't realized how passionate his wolf was for me. He sat back on his legs and pulled me to him as he drove into me over and over, it felt almost like I would split into. Then he turned me over without pulling out of me. I got on my knees and felt the most pleasure I had ever felt in my life. I looked up and noticed the full length mirror. I looked into it at Dyson and his eyes were bright amber. That's when I knew I had my wolf. I just watched him for a few minutes, until I felt my climax rising and I thrust back against him. He looked up and I saw his eyes return to came together in a burst of passion neither one of us expected. We almost lost our breath.

As we laid there trying to breathe, trying to take in what had just happened. When I looked over to Dyson he was staring at me. "What is it Dyson?"

"I never imagined you could handle my wolf like that."

"I didn't know I could either. But I did a good job didn't I?"

He looked at me and said, "I have been afraid to let him come out, because I was afraid he would hurt you."

"I knew he wouldn't hurt me, because he is part of you. I have never had sex like that before, it was like fireworks inside me."

"Oh Kenzi, I knew being with you would be different, but you surprised me. I want to ask you something and I hope you will say yes."

"What Dyson?"

He reached over and took out a small box and then he took my hand. "Kenzi, I want you to marry me, please."

I looked into his eyes and I asked him if was sure.

"Yes Kenzi my beautiful love, I want you to be my wife, I love you."

As tears came to my eyes I kissed him and said, "Yes Dyson I will marry you."

He kissed me and told me that I had made him the happiest man alive. We laid there knowing that we would be together forever. I loved the ring it was a large sapphire surrounded by diamonds. I couldn't wait to show it off. But I didn't want to leave Dyson just yet.

After we showered we decided to go to the Dal, and meet with our friends. We walked in side by side. Bo was the first to greet me as we sat down, she said, "Something is different." I just smiled at her. Then Hale came in and then I was ready to tell them.

"Trick can I see you over here for a moment?"

When Trick got over to us I said," I have an announcement to make. I'm getting married." The three of them errupted in questions. Then they were silent.

They all looked at Dyson. "Did you already know?"

He smiled and said,"I should I _am_ the man she is marrying." There were gasps and I looked at Bo.

"Come with me please, I need to talk to you. Please don't hate me , I know that Dyson is your ex, it just happened. Please tell me that we are okay."

She looked at me and smiled, "I'm not mad and I don't hate you. I'm happy for you. Dyson is a good man, you couldn't have done better." Then we hugged. We went back into the bar and Dyson looked at me. With a look I told him that it was okay. He breathed a sigh of relief and held out his arms to me. I went into them kissing him.

Then Trick said, "Drinks are on the house!"


	2. Chapter 2

As happy as I was I couldn't get over the memories of my past. Each night the nightmares got worse images of my step father looming over me . The smell of the alcohol the look on his face. I couldn't get it out of my mind. I tried to hide this from Dyson, but it was getting hard to keep it from him. I knew I had to go. I couldn't hide from him forever.

Holy shit balls jt was hard to leave, but it was for the best. If I kept telling myself that, maybe I would eventually believe it. As I looked at him sleeping, all I wanted to do was crawl back into bed with him. I had never felt so hurt and so lonely in my life. I had decided to leave him a note.

D

I love you more than I have ever loved anyone on my life. I just can't burden you with the pain that I have suffered. I know that you don't know what I am talking about, but trust me there is nothing that you can do to help.

Please understand you are the love of my life, and know that will never change.

I love you

K

With that done, I turned and left. Leaving behind my only chance at happiness. The tears fell, I could not stop them. I found myself driving to a part of town that I hadn't been to since I was sixteen. As I got closer the pain took over. I pulled into the drive of house where it had all happened.

And then he walked out . All of the rage , pain, and shame hit me all at once. I was that helpless little girl again. Being held down and forced to deal with his unwanted attention. I remember him kissing me and forcing my legs apart. I would try to remove myself, but it never seemed to work. I was always there enduring the unspeakable acts.

When it was over I would get up and stumble to bathroom and clean myself up. The blood would flow for hours and I would spend the night changing sheets and my panties and cleaning myself up again and again. I hurt down there constantly. I suffered from numerous infections and had to go to the doctor all the time. When I came down with an std, the doctor finally reported it to child protection services. That's when I was finally was taken from that house.

I came back to the present, he was right beside my car. I looked into his eyes and I couldn't move. He opened the door and grabbed me. That's when I snapped out of it. I kicked him and cranked the car, I got out of there as quick as I could.

I went to the nearest hotel and got a room. I collapsed on the bed crying uncontrollably . I was sinking into my memories and I needed a drink.

Back at the Dal. Dyson sat at the bar brooding over the note that Kenzi had left him. He thought everything was fine, until he woke up this morning. That's when his world came crashing around him.

He had gotten up and went looking for her. When he couldn't find her he looked around for any sign of where she might have gone. He found the note and the ring. As he read it he was stuck by the worst pain he had ever felt. He could literally feel his heart ripping into.

Trick came over to his old friend. He asked , "What's up? " Dyson looked up at him and said, " She is gone." Trick looked shocked." Come to the backroom."

" What's going on Dyson?"

Kenzi left. Then he handed Trick the note. As he was reading it his eyes when back and forth to his friend.

"Can't you find her?"

" I don't even know where to look. "

"You have to find her, Dyson."

"Trick, I know that."

But where do I start. Dyson you are a cop. Use your resources. I will see you later , I have to get to work. Let me know if I can help. I will . With that he was gone.

I was sitting in the hotel room drinking alone. I wanted to hear Dyson's voice. I picked up my phone and turned it on. There were several messages from Dyson. As I listened to them I cried harder with each one. I started to call him, but I couldn't dial the number. I had to leave him alone, he had to get over me and I had to forget him. That was going to be easier said than done.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or anything associated with the show. Warning: Sexual Abuse content.


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own any of these characters. They are the property of showcase and the production team.

I am sorry it has taken so long to post this chapter, I have been thinking about how to proceed.

As I sat in the hotel room drinking, I could not help but think of Dyson. I so wanted to talk to him. So I called him, I needed to hear his voice.

When he answered the call, he was so excited." Kenzi. baby where are you?"

I couldn't tell him that. So I changed the subject. How are you, Dyson?

"I am fine Kenzi, How are you? "

"I am just super Kujo. "

"You sound drunk Kenzi."

"I am just a little tipsy. I just needed to hear your voice."

'Kenzi, please tell me where you are. '

"Dyson I can't do that , not yet. "

'This is something I gotta do on my own."

"Kenzi please take care of yourself."

" Dyson I will, I love you."

" Kenzi , you know I love you. "

I hung up and felt a little better. So I decided to get some sleep.

When I woke up I made the decision to confront my step father. As I dressed i got more nervous. I had to do this. It was the only way I could put this behind me. But I was more than a little apprehensive. The closer I got to the house the more I wanted to turn around and run. But I forced myself to continue. I got out of the car and walked to the door. As I was knocking on the door all of the dread that I had felt engulfed me. I forced myself to push it back. He opened the door and was surprised to see me. He reached out and grabbed my wrist and I shook him off and walked in.

"What do you want here?'

"I just want to put the past to rest, and get on with my life."

"How do you propose to do that?"

'I want to understand why you did what you did to me.'

'I hated you. Hated having to take care of you." And I wanted to fuck you up so you wouldn't be any good to anyone else.

"Why would you do that to a child?"

Because I wanted you gone. I thought I could force you to run away. And finally you did. It was the best thing you ever did. Although I did miss the sex we used to have.

"You mean the rape that you forced on me."

"Call it what you will, you enjoyed it."

"No I hated every minute of it."

" Let's see."

Before I knew what was happening he was on top of me. He ripped my clothes and entered me. He was so rough that I could feel myself ripping. I cried and fought until he finally got off of me. I got up pulled on my ripped dress and left. I was driving I didn't know where but I had to get away from him. I found myself outside the Dal. I picked up my phone and dialed Dyson's number. Through my tears I asked him where he was. He said he was at the Dal. Could you come outside and don't tell the others . He hung up and was there in a second. He looked at me and knew what had happened immediately. I looked at him and then dropped my eyes. He took my face in his hands and raised it to look me in the eyes. Don't ever do that Kenzi it isn't your fault, but we need to take you to the hospital.

After the exam and talking to the police I was ready to go home. Dyson was so sweet he held me and walked me to the car. As we rode to his loft I didn't talk . I would glance at him from time to time and I would see the look of worry on his face. We didn't say anything until we got inside. I took the chance to look at him. He looked so sad and worried. I spoke up. Dyson I can go to Bo's if that would be better. He came over to me and said,'Kenzi this is your home of course you will stay here.

" But I feel like you don't want me here.' It's ok I understand that you don't want me anymore.

"No Kenzi never think that I don't want you." That is not the case at all. I just don't know whether to try to hold you or if you will try to pull away.

"Oh Dyson I would never pull away from you, you are the only man I want near me."

A big smile came to his face and he scooped me up in a big hug, It felt so good to be in his arms again. I just closed my eyes and listened to his heartbeat. Before I knew it I was sleepy and I told him I wanted to lie down. He led me over to the bed and I laid down. I could tell he wanted to kiss me, but he was afraid. I reached up and put my hand in his hair and brought his head down to gently kiss him. That put him at ease. He said he had some files to look over so he would be at the table if I needed him. I snuggled down to rest. I was sleepimg good until my step father invaded my dreams. I began to scream and then Dyson was there. He touched me and I drew back and then he shook me and I woke up. I jumped at him grabbing him into a hug that would have crushed a normal person. Dyson I am so sorry about screaming I will try not to do that anymore.

He looked at me and said," Kenzi I know that you have been through a traumatic expierience it is ok. You will have alot to deal with in the coming months and I will be here for you. "

'Dyson I love you so much." "I never should have left.' 'I should have told you what was going on."

"Yes, you should have ." Maybe I could have prevented it.

"I promise you that I will never do that again.'' " I will tell you everything from now on.'

'See that you do."

We just laid there until I went back to sleep. I felt safe with him. I didn't have anymore bad dreams that night, but they did come for a month or so. Six weeks after the rape I was cleared by the doctor. My stitches had healed. I had waited for this day I wanted to make love to Dyson so much.

When Dyson got home he called my name. I didn't answer I wanted him to find me. He was searching all over the house. Finally he came into the bedroom. There I stood with a very sexy nitey on. His eyes opened wide at the sight of me. I walked over to him with my arms outstretched. He came into them so fast that I almost fell. I laughed at him and then I kissed him with all the passion that I had. He pulled back and asked me if I was sure. I told him that I was so sure. He led me to the bed and made love to me so gentle. I almost cried at the tenderness. It was the best and just what I needed. He always knew just what I needed. As we lay there holding each other we were content and happy.

The next day when I woke up I didn't see Dyson. I got out of bed and searched for him. He was sitting at the bar in the kitchen looking at a file. I came up behind him and hugged him. I looked over his shoulder and saw my name on the file he was holding.

"No, you can't look at this Dyson." I freaked out. I went to grab it and he pulled it away.

Calm down Kenzi. i have to look at this I have to know what he he put you through. I have to testify at the trial that will put him away. I fell apart and ran from the room. He came after me. I couldn't let him get near me not after he had read what had happened to me. I couldn't even look at him. He came up behind me and tried to hug me. I jumped away from him. As I looked at him I could see the confusion in his eyes.

"Dyson, I know that you have read all that happened to me, and I can understand that you probably don't want me anymore. "

"Kenzi, It was not your fault. "

"Everything that happened to you was because of a cruel man, and not anything you did."

"Dyson, do you mean that?"

"Oh Kenzi, I love you and I mean everything I said, it was not your fault."

"Dyson, I love you, too."

Then I came up to him and put my arms around him. He held me for what seemed like forever. When I pulled back he kissed me. It was such a tender kiss it took my breath away. In that moment I knew I could face anything. As long as I had my wolf man I could do anything.


	4. Chapter 4

I do not own any of these characters. They are the property of the production co.

The trial

As the day of the trial approached I was so nervous. I had almost backed out on several occasions. But with Dyson by my side I knew I couldn't lose.

He was my rock and my reason for going through all of this. I wanted nothing more than to put all of this behind me. He convinced me that after the trail and conviction I would be able to forget what had happened to me. I would finally get closure.

As we got ready to appear in court, Dyson knew that i didn't want to go. He tried to make me feel better, but it wasn't working. I knew I would have to face him and it scared the hell out of me. I walked into the courtroom with my head down. Dyson took my chin and pushed my head up so he could look into my eyes.

"Kenzi all you have to do is look at me while you are testifing and you will be fine."

"I love you Dyson."

"I love you ,too."

Even though I was looking at Dyson it didn't go easy. I broke down several times. Finally I had to be led from the witness stand and out of the courtroom. As I left I looked at Dyson, he was livid. I was wondering what he was so upset about. When I had calmed down I returned to the courtroom. Dyson wasn't there. I could not imagine where he was. Court was ended for the day. I caught a cab to the Dal.

I expected to see Dyson there, but he wasn't here. I asked Trick if he had been there. He told me he hadn't seen him all day. I was starting to worry. I decided to go home.

Upon arriving I went to run me a bath. That's when I saw him. He was covered in blood.

"Dyson, what happened, are you hurt?"

"No Kenzi, I am not hurt."

Where did all the blood come from? He just looked at me and shook his head.

" Tell me Dyson or I am leaving. "

"Kenzi, you can't go."

"Don't you know how much I want to be with you." "You are everything to me and I couldn't bare to lose you." "I saw how hard it was for you today and I only wanted to make it easier for you."

"Dyson,what have you done?"

"I took care of it."

"Tell me ,now."

"Kenzi, please understand I can't tell you just now."

"Why not, Dyson?"

" It will all become clear at court tomorrow."

"Just know I did it all for you."

" Dyson , please tell me what is going on."

"Ok my love, but listen before you say anything."

He began to tell me about a case he had been working on. It involved my step father. He had gotten mixed up with some dark Fae. They were killing humans at an alarming rate and needed to be stopped. So as punishment for this Dyson and Hale had been given permission to kill any one associated with these dark Fae. Up to and including my step father. The blood he had on him was my step father's blood. As he looked at me I could see that he had a satisfied look in his eyes. When we were taking him back to jail after the trial, we were instructed to handle him.

"Kenzi, I took pleasure in killing him for what he had done to you."

"Oh my sweet sexy wolf man, you always come to my rescue."

All I could do at that moment was hug him. He had once again saved me. He truly was my knight in hairy armour. I knew at that moment that I would never have to worry about anything as long as he was with me.

" Dyson, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure my love, what is it?"

" Did he beg for mercy?"

"Yes, he did. " "And I told him that since he couldn't give you mercy he wouldn't get any either."

"You are my hero, Dyson. I love you so much."

"Promise me that you will always be mine."

" Dyson, you know that I will be with you as long as I live and after I will be in your heart."

" I wish there were a way I could live as long as you."

" I will need to talk to Trick about that, tomorrow."

" But now I want to take you to bed and show you how much I want you."

" Do you intend to ravish little ole me?"

" I fully intend on ravishing every inch of you body." " Starting with your lips and so on."

" Take me to bed you sexy wolf man you.'

All that night and into the wee hours of the morning he ravished me and I him. I was so tired when we got to the courthouse I barely paid any attention to what was going on. All I understood was that since he was dead there would be no more trial. That made me happy. When it was over all I wanted to do was go home and curl up next to Dyson and sleep. So that is just what we did.

We woke up at around six that evening. Dyson wanted to go celebrate. So it was off to the Dal.

I was sitting at the bar sipping on a shot that Trick had poured for me. Trick looked at me strangely and asked if I was feeling ok. I told him that I had an upset told me to go lie down on his couch away from the noise of the bar. So I went down to his apartment and laid down. I had only been there a few moments when Dyson came down. He asked if I was ok. I told him it was nothing, probably the excitement of the last few days. I told him to go back up and play pool with Hale. I would be ok I just needed to rest. So he kissed me and left. As I lay there I could tell there was something really wrong, but I couldn't tell him. When Trick came to check on me I asked him if we could talk.

"Sure Kenzi, what's up?"

I told him how I had been feeling lately. That I had all but lost my appetite, I was becoming weaker by the day and I couldn't stand up for long periods of time. By the time I had told him that much I passed out. When I came out of it he was looking very worried. Kenzi I need to research this and find out what is wrong with you. Trick, please don't tell Dyson. He has been so worried about me with the trial and all. I don't want to worry him anymore. He agreed with me to my relief. I decided to rest a while longer so I laid back on the couch and went to sleep. When I finally woke up Dyson was sitting next to me. Hello handsome, what's up?

"Kenzi, are you ok?"

"Yes my love I am fine, just a little tired."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes Dyson, I am just tired from the last few days that's all."

I tell you what let's go home and snuggle. That sounds great to me. So we said our goodbyes and left. When we got home he pulled me into a hug and kissed me with all the passion he had. I looked at him and smiled at him. I took his hand and led him to the bed. We made love all night long. I was so incrediably happy to be with my wolf man, everything just seemed right, until.

When I was awakened by a pain so intense that it took my breath away. All I could do was scream. Dyson had just gotten out of the shower. He came running in the room wearing only a towel.

'Kenzi, what's wrong ?"

All I could do was look at him I couldn't speak it hurt too much. He looked so scared for me. I put my hand on his face just as another pain hit me. i dropped my hand and bit my lip to keep from screaming. He looked at me and saw I was biting my lip so hard that it was bleeding. When the paIn subsided I raised my eyes to his. i hadn't realized that I was crying. He wiped my tears and kissed me and licked my lip until it healed.

"Kenzi, we need to find out what is happening to you."

"Dyson take me to Trick.'

"He is the only one who can help."

So we got ready and went to the Dal. We motioned for Trick to come downstairs. After we told him what was going on, he told us what he thought was happening.


	5. Chapter 5

The Realization

I do not own any of these characters.

As Trick talked we listened closely. He was telling us the story of how humans gain a Fae lifespan. i asked him if I could be going through that too. He looked at me and smiled. yes Kenzi you are. In the next week you will expierience a great deal of pain. I wish i could help with that , but alas I can not. You can't be left alone. He then looked at Dyson. Can you be with her? Yes he said he could. He then held out his pinky to i hooked my pinky with his I kissed him . I knew I would make it through this .

In the next week I was in so much pain that I didn't really know where or who I was. I was in and out of it. I could only recognize one person and that was Dyson. I kissed him when I was awake, it was the only time I didn't hurt. As the time drew near for the pain to be over, it intensified. As each wave of pain hit me I would pass out and come to when it stopped. But only for a few moments. Then I would be out again. While I was awake I told Dyson I loved him. He was about to say something when I passed out again. but somehow in my mind I heard him. He was saying he loved me too, and begging me to come back to him. In my next moment of clarity I grabbed him and hugged him so close that I felt like we were one person. The next time I woke I was pain free.

I looked at Dyson and said," I think it is over."

He smiled at me .

" I was so worried about you my love."

" I am fine now Dyson."

" I want to take a shower."

" Are you sure you can stand?"

"I think so."

"Let me help you."

So with his help I got into the shower. I wasn't sure if I could do it on my own so I asked him to help me. That was what he was waiting on. He gladly undressed and jumped in the shower with me. That shower took a bit longer than most. But we finally got done and got out. So what do you want to do today? I would like to go to the Dal if that is okay. Are you sure you are up to it? I think I can handle it. But if I get tired I will let you know so you can bring me home. He agreed . So to the Dal we went.

When we walked in Trick rushed over to us. How are Kenzi? I am peachy keen Trickster. That is so good to hear. Come have a drink. Trick led me to the bar. He poured me a shot and left to see to his other customers. Hale walked up to me and held out his hand to do one of our handshakes. After that we hugged and he told me he had missed me. I have missed your face too. Dyson was stamding behind me with his arms around me. He leaned in to whisper in my ear. I love you so much, Kenzi. I turned and looked at him. I love you more than I ever thought I could love anyone. Since you think that way I have something to ask you. What is that Dyson? He got up and knelt down on one knee.

"Kenzi, will you marry me?"

Yes, Dyson I would love to marry you."

I knew then that I would always be happy. I had my wolf man and all was right.


End file.
